Who Is Your Perfect Match?

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There may be no such thing as the perfect match, but an ideal partner can be found in someone who has developed themselves in certain ways that go beyond looks, charms and success.

The reasons we fall in love may be a mystery, but the reasons we stay in love are far less elusive. There may be no such thing as the perfect partner, but an ideal partner can be found in someone who has developed themselves in certain ways that go beyond the surface of the perfect matchmaking.


Being “grown up” isn’t merely a matter of not acting like a kid anymore. Truly grow up means making an active effort to recognize and resolve negative influences from our past. An ideal partner is thus willing to reflect on his or her history and is interested in understanding how old events inform current behaviors.

Having broken ties to old identities and patterns, this person is much more available to a romantic partner and the new family that they create together.


No human being is perfect, so finding someone who is approachable and receptive to feedback can be a huge asset to a lasting union. When someone is free-thinking and open-minded, it enables them to be forthright in expressing feelings, thoughts, dreams and desires, which allows you to truly know them. Like perfect people, perfect unions do not exist, so finding someone with whom you can talk about an area that you feel is lacking in your relationship and who is open to evolving is more than half the battle.


The ideal partner realizes the importance of honesty in a close relationship. Honesty builds trust between people. The ideal partner strives to live a life of integrity so that there are no discrepancies between words and actions. This goes for all levels of communication, both verbal and nonverbal. Being open and honest in our most intimate relationships means really knowing ourselves and our intentions.


Ideal partners value each others’ interests separate from their own. Ideal partners treat each other with respect and sensitivity. They do not try to control each other with threatening or manipulative behavior. They are respectful of their partner’s distinct personal boundaries, while at the same time remaining close physically and emotionally. .


The perfect match perceives their mate on both an intellectual, observational level and an emotional, intuitive level. When two people in a couple understand each other, they become aware of the commonalities that exist between them and also recognize and appreciate the differences. Developing our ability to be emphatic helps us understand and attune to our partner.


The perfect match is easily affectionate and responsive on many levels: physically, emotionally and verbally. Being open to both giving and receiving affection adds a poignant feeling to our lives.


The ideal partner has a sense of humor. A sense of humor can be a lifesaver in a relationship. Couples who are playful and teasing often defuse potentially volatile situations with their humor. A good sense of humor definitely eases the tense moments in a relationship. Plus, it is one of life’s greatest joys to be able to laugh with someone close to us.

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